Loving Vancouver

"I'm a country girl", I've always said.
I grew up on a farm, how could I be any other way?
I lived on acreage with a nature playground as my backyard.
I always figured I would remain a country girl, couldn't really see it any other way.
Never really imagined or wanted to live in the city, unless it was "for a short time only".

Then, one year ago on June 9, 2012 I moved to Vancouver, "for a job".
I moved here for that sole practical reason, or at least that is what I was telling myself and others.
We started "living in community" at that time, although I think that we've been continually learning what that has meant. God is constantly revealing and teaching us what community is really about, especially since all of us left places where had pre-existing community near by to live in Vancouver.

I have grown to love Vancouver. I even consider it home. HOME. This is a BIG deal.
I never, ever thought I would say those words out loud or write them on a blog to be read by others.
It took many months of living here to stop calling my parents' home "my home", even though it will always be a home to me. I fought to prevent myself from calling Vancouver home. I worked hard to believe it was only temporary.

But, when God puts something in you, there isn't a whole lot you can do as my "roommate" said today.

He's put it in me to love Vancouver. To be fully present here. To love people here. To build community here. To grow in him here. This is a very recent revelation, or rather it is only recently that I'm accepting of all of this. I'm learning slowly what this all looks like. I think it's safe to say I feel called to be in Vancouver for right now, until God reveals otherwise. It's good he reveals in parts. I really believe it's God's grace that we don't always see the big picture, and that we only see things partially and as he reveals. Would I have moved if I had known I would be staying longer than a year? I think deep down I knew it would be longer, but I certainly wasn't willing to accept it at the time. It's like what Paul writes:

Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

1 Cor 13:12 (NLT)

I remember driving back to Vancouver from Langley after church with one of my friends. She has been living in Vancouver for several years and was saying that she always feel so refreshed and excited as she drives back into the city, especially after being away for a few days. I recall wondering if I would ever feel that way about the city, and concluded that I wouldn't. I'm a country girl right? I love wide open spaces, the city can be "claustrophobic".

I feel that way now, just how she described it, and I can't even put it into words fully. I had those feelings as I drove back to Vancouver the other day after spending some restful days in Langley visiting with friends and family. I'm at home in Vancouver. I think for a long time I thought I had to feel completely settled in order to feel at home somewhere, but I'm really at home wherever God has me. I always thought other people were called to be in the city, but not me. I was just here temporarily for a job. Well that job is not temporary, and me living here is definitely not temporary.

God's done a lot of work on this in me. It's definitely taken a long time and been a process.
I've laid things down, and let things die. I've stopped asking "why" and embraced the journey which is full of growth and grace. The safest place to be is in HIS will.

Does that mean that the country girl in me is gone? No, but she is thriving in the city and learning to be content and at home wherever God has her. So, embrace where you are at, wherever God has called you to be, doing whatever he has called you to do and you can love it!